I’m alone. Slow and steady, from my stomach, through my heart, through my throat and out of my eyes. Waves begging for something I don’t know how to give. Why are you back? Why are you bothering me again? I’ve eaten, I’ve slept, I’ve walked, I’ve talked, I’ve worked, I’ve cleaned, I’ve thought so deeply … Continue reading 4/20/2023
Tag: Depression
The One with the Aliens
Trapped here, Between my heart and my gut, Caged by my ribs and a mind too open, I’m Fighting for a freedom I don’t really need. Your eyes plead, “Don’t leave…” But your arms are wrapped around another. “Soul mate,” or side dish? I’ve never known the difference. Not here, anyways. “You complete me.” Is … Continue reading The One with the Aliens
No title
Can I just disappear? If I do, what happens to this confusion? I don’t know what I’m doing... I just know I don’t belong. It’s a problem I can’t solve. No matter what I do, I always feel alone.
To Let You Down Easy
Wrap me in your silky arms, ribbons of love around my wrists. I’ve found myself within your knots, Tied up, then down, then in your kiss. This noose that hangs around my throat, A final breath I'll never miss. Suffocating in our dreams, Consoled through death by wandering lips.
Doodling with Words #2
They promised a younger me that love would be sweet. It would hold me, late at night, and listen to me weep like a child calling for mom, or a wolf howling to pack. I’d wrap myself in my lover’s arms, safe to simply act. But that is not the case, for truth is never … Continue reading Doodling with Words #2
Still Trapped.
There is no way to cleanse you from my blood; the DNA that spreads through me, entangled in a history of you and us and insanity, is permanently tattooed on my life like the ink in my skin that reminds me, each day, to move on. I scrub myself red and raw, crying to empty … Continue reading Still Trapped.
On Mental Guests.
Oh, hello! I see you’ve come to play. I’ve no time to bounce a ball, But you can hide in my mind And throw a stone or two. Just don’t break anything, it’s fragile in there. Glass, everywhere. Perhaps we can become friends? You show me yours, I’ll show you mine? There’s plenty of space … Continue reading On Mental Guests.
Take It.
Take a pill, Every day. Take it, or else no one will love you. You’ll ruin every friendship, And your peers will fade. Take it, or else You might not wake up tomorrow. We know it makes you drowsy, unable to really function, and dulls your creativity, But it elongates your life And makes you … Continue reading Take It.
Controlled by You
Help me learn to help myself, Without your kind words of soft-spoken promise. I can be more without you, you know? If only you’d let me exist beyond… As it is, I need you to breathe, To eat, and to sleep! I can’t be trusted without your breath on my neck, And your desires in … Continue reading Controlled by You
The Wall
Built by words of hate Separates with hollow fear Divides me in two
CaliStray 